There was a time when getting engaged meant showing your parents the ring and receiving a new toaster from an aunt. These days, quite rightly, it’s an excellent excuse for a party.
An engagement party occupies a rather nice spot in the celebrations. It doesn’t have the formality of the wedding itself, there are no speeches that need to last precisely seven minutes, nobody is worrying about the photographer disappearing before the cake is cut and, best of all, the happy couple can simply enjoy themselves.
Two Families, One Dancefloor
One of the nicest things about an engagement party is that it’s often the first occasion when the two sides properly meet.
Friends from work encounter childhood friends. Parents meet parents. Aunties are introduced to university mates. People who will eventually be sharing tables at the wedding get a chance to discover each other beforehand.
Music is remarkably good at breaking down those barriers.
A good engagement party DJ isn’t simply there to play a collection of favourite records. The trick is finding the music that connects a room containing different ages, tastes and friendship groups – and gradually turning a gathering of separate little groups into one party.
Don’t Make It a Rehearsal for the Wedding
An engagement party should have its own identity.
If you’re already planning a big wedding reception, there’s no need to reproduce it six months early. Engagement parties generally work better when they’re a little more relaxed.
That might mean a favourite local venue, a private room in a pub, a village hall transformed for the evening, a marquee at home or somewhere completely unexpected.
The music can be more relaxed too. Requests from guests can work particularly well because they get people involved, and there’s usually far more freedom to jump between decades and genres without worrying about traditional wedding formalities.
And no, you don’t have to spend the entire evening listening to songs containing the words love, marry or forever.
Give People Something to Celebrate
It sounds obvious, but an engagement party needs to feel like an occasion rather than simply drinks with a larger-than-usual number of people.
Lighting, decoration and music make an enormous difference. Even a fairly ordinary function room can feel completely different once the lights are lowered, the room is dressed and there’s a proper soundtrack playing as guests arrive.
That’s also where an experienced DJ earns his keep. The music at 7.30pm while people are arriving and saying hello shouldn’t necessarily be the music you need at 10.30pm when everyone has decided tomorrow morning can look after itself.
Reading that change in mood is a big part of the job.
Your Party, Your Music
I’ve been DJing at parties and celebrations for many years, and I never arrive with a predetermined playlist that gets inflicted upon everybody in the room.
Tell me what you love. Tell me what you hate. Give me some essential songs beforehand and encourage your guests to make requests on the night. From there, I can build the music around the people actually standing in front of me.
After all, the wedding may be the main event – but there’s absolutely no reason the party before the party shouldn’t be a memorable one too.
